Feeling Blue

Blue is the word of the day. I've been feeling blue. I'm seeing blue. Lots and lots of blue... but not all bad!

My sister went to Carter's this morning to shop for our baby boys - mine and hers. Because my shopping ability is limited to the Internet for the time being, I asked her to pick out a few essential layette items for the baby. In my opinion, shopping for baby clothes online is next to impossible. Not only is the selection overwhelming, but the prices are inflated, too. So I depended on my sister's good taste (and keen eye for a good sale) to furnish baby's first wardrobe! She brought me a bag full of absolutely precious (in a masculine sort of way) pieces - from sleepers to onesies to his all-too-important coming home outfit. And let me tell you, she did not disappoint. There is so much blue in that bag! Oh my goodness. When Stefan and I learned that we were having a boy, we went through all of the totes of clothes from Ava's first year to see if we could find anything unisex to use for the new baby. We failed. I found white onesies in every size, and that's about it. So until this morning, our little boy was going to be naked, which would have been acceptable until about age 10.

There is a part of me that is angry and sad that I am missing out on preparing for our son's arrival, but then I remind myself that I am doing what I need to be doing right now to ensure a safe, healthy, and as-close-as-possible-to-full-term arrival. I joined a high-risk pregnancy support group last night called Sidelines. It is for moms and families dealing with the challenges of high-risk pregnancies, and they also provide support for moms on bed rest. There are chat rooms, message centers, and counselors who contact you individually to offer support for whatever you're feeling. All counselors and volunteers have endured at least one high-risk pregnancy themselves, so they know what we're going through. I'm looking forward to connecting with other moms who are on bed rest. It's funny... Millions and millions of women are put on bed rest each year to deal with complications during pregnancy. But when you're laying here day after day, you feel like you're the only one.

But right this moment, I seem to have found a cure for my blues... surround myself with piles of it.