Finding Balance: Striving to Get Out of My Pajamas

Thank you, Lord. Stefan's week-long business trip to Malaysia, originally scheduled for next week, was canceled yesterday. The company put a stop to all travel for a while. I know Stefan is a little disappointed because he was looking forward to his first trip to Asia, but I, on the other hand, am thrilled. This trip was the source of a lot of anxiety for me; Ian is only three weeks old, after all. It's not that I was stressed about caring for two babies on my own. These past couple of weeks I have pleasantly surprised myself with how well I can manage both kids, the house and myself. What had me stressed was: 1) Stefan traveling half-way around the world, and 2) My ability to go 7 days straight without a break. Stefan is such a huge help to me in the evenings and on weekends that I was mostly concerned about my stamina more than anything. Single moms, I don't know how in the world you do it.

So far, I have been proud of the job I've been doing since Stefan's return to work. We've gotten ourselves into a little routine, and each day, both kids are dressed, fed and happy. I spend lots of "special time" with Ava while Ian naps. We color, play with Play-Doh, or make food in her kitchen. Sometimes we split a small portion of candy, just the two of us. Granted, the dishwasher may not get emptied or the toilets may not get scrubbed, but I'm investing in my daughter so that she knows how special she is and that Ian is an addition to our family... not her replacement. I think Stefan and I have done a good job of making sure Ava feels extra loved during this time of transition.

Each day, I strive to add something else to the day. Both kids may be well fed and dressed, but I am still in my pajamas and snacking on cookies. It's all about balance, and I strive toward that goal everyday. For example, yesterday I took the kids to my sister's for a couple of hours. It was a good way to get Ava out of the house and me in a better frame of mind. Ava got to play with other kids and I got to be social. Maybe tomorrow I'll put on something other than pajamas. Hair and makeup come next. Pretty soon, I may start to look human again! Well, maybe after a brow wax.

Ian has settled into a quasi-routine, for now. He eats every two hours during the day and every three hours at night. This means I am up twice to feed him: at 2 a.m. and again at 5 a.m. I think this is pretty reasonable for a three-week-old, and the good news is he eats, burps and goes right back to sleep. Shhh, don't tell him, but I kind of enjoy those feedings. He just looks up at me as he drinks his milk, and the house is quiet and dark. It's just the two of us, and he drifts back to sleep in my arms. It's nice, but I'm glad it's not forever. Ian has been having more awake periods, and he loves his swing. He spends most of the day downstairs with the family. We have a Baby Papasan that he sleeps in and hangs out in. That thing paid for itself in the first week. He goes upstairs to his crib for one nap a day - when Ava is also napping. He also sleeps all night in his crib. We're trying to be consistent with his sleeping places so that he begins to associate his crib with extended sleep periods and the papasan with shorter naps.