Note: To those who read our blog regularly, please note that in addition to being a way to share family news and events, I am also using this blog as a way to chronicle my bed rest and pregnancy. My apologies if all recent blogs have been emotional or "downers." I promise there will be better days ahead! In the meantime, I'm just trying to make sure I journal the reality of our world so that we always have a way of remembering this time.
Today has been a day of ups and downs. I had a great night's sleep (thanks to Ambien - that stuff rocks!), and my 8 a.m. ultrasound showed that my condition is improving. I was almost giddy with excitement until I got the results from my second Fetal Fibronectin (FFn) Test: still positive. My doctor almost expected another positive test and said he wasn't too concerned, but I was discouraged. The positive test says I'm still a high risk to deliver early. I had a difficult afternoon with cramps and irritability, and the most frustrating thing is that I don't know for sure what is causing all of this upset. Most likely, it is the massive load of antibiotics I have raging through my system right now, but we won't know for sure until next week, after treatment is completed. Until then, I'm baffled. The doctors agree that I am OK to go home, but am I OK to let me go home? Believe me, nothing would be better. But I am so scared. After all, I am still experiencing the same symptoms that brought me here for a second time Tuesday morning. Cramps. Mild contractions. Insomnia (without the aid of Ambien - did I mention that stuff rocks?). We live 40 minutes from the hospital. I know I can't spend the next 8+ (hopefully and prayerfully) in the hospital "just incase," but I can't help but feel very insecure about going home.
Little Notes
Baby Boy has been very active today, doing rolls and somersaults. I wish that I could go back to simply enjoying them instead of stressing so much about everything else.
The USA Today Crossword Puzzle is not easy. The Sudoku isn't exactly a cupcake, either.
Hospital grilled cheese isn't half bad. I'm not saying it's good, but it's not bad.
Daytime TV is beyond awful.
Ambien rocks.
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1 comment:
Hmmm... Ambien...
You know me... Perhaps I should try it? I have a lower eyelid twitch now from my insomniac/vampire syndrome.
Sure is attractive, and complete strangers think I am winking at them.
Thinking of you, girlie... just watch Ellen.
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